When we are mean to ourselves, it keeps us thinking that we are still in danger. When we feel in danger, we get stuck in the freeze and numbed response of our primitive brains. We all have the ability to solve our own problems in our logical brains, but when we are stuck in our primitive brains we can’t access our logic for long enough to change. when we are kind to ourselves, it is more likely that we will find the way to get ourselves unstuck.
We need to self-soothe rather than self-sabotage to teach our primitive brains that we are safe now and we can change. We can’t recover from pain when we keep causing ourselves pain. To change, we need to feel safe, supported and treated with kindness. We need to treat ourselves this way first. When we feel like this, our logical brains can step up and find a solution to many of our problems.
Take your time.
It takes time to feel safe, supported and to treat ourselves with enough kindness to allow our primitive selves to feel safe enough to let us recover from our painful past experiences. We live in a next-day delivery society where we are used to instant gratification and Netflix on-demand. We want things done yesterday. Your primitive brain, the part that is coping using binge eating, needs gentleness, kindness and time to heal. How can you treat yourself with kindness today?